Managing Your Move to or in Dallas: Expectations vs. Reality--Part 102/18/2018Moving is the mature equal of middle school—everyone is really zealous about the prospect, but it is only the people with reasonable expectations who end up having a trouble-free move. Yes, it is a new abode, a new beginning, and the possibility of a wonderful new life--but once that last empty moving van leaves and you are standing there in the middle of your boxes, you have still got to do the actual work. Managing your move with realistic expectations is essential to beginning that new life on a positive note--and that equates to not only accepting the fact that a new abode will not wondrously melt off the fifteen pounds you want to lose, but that moving is emotionally difficult even in the best circumstances and you and your family should appropriate the time and space to accept that. One of the odd things about a local move--new home, neighborhoods, schools--is that can be harder on the kids than a long-distance relocation. A new home across the country takes away the constant requests to go hang with their friends in the old neighborhood, and it is less difficult to adopt a new life and new friends when your old ones are in a different time zone. But back to the topic. There are three Ps to think about when managing your move to or in Dallas--Purge, Pack, and Pay. What you do not purge has to be packed, and the more you pack, the more you will pay. Expectation—I will get rid of old stuff and only hang on to what I love. Reality--you love a lot more than you realize you do. Whether you take care of your own packing or hire professionals, you have got to select what is worth the time and money to pack and move. Purge Purging is one of those weird terms you don't hear a lot, at least in a positive connotation. But really, releasing the old baggage is one of the smartest ways that you can let your new home to bestow your expectations of wonderful. There are lots and lots of rules and suggestions to assist you in figuring out the best approaches to sort through your old things, from down-to-earth--"if you haven't used/worn it in a year get rid of it"; to a bit off-the-wall--"toss all your negative energy out with the old towels". At its simplest level, purging is simply sorting through all the cupboards, closets and drawers and making three piles: take with you, get rid of, donate. Or you might have four piles if you have got some nice things that you do not need anymore, and consign those things. A difficult thing about purging is retaining the aloofness in order to be cutthroat about tossing things. If you kept all those pre-school paintings, how can you toss them and be a great parent? Here is a tip—appoint a friend to assist you to pick through items and talk you through why you are saving items that are really better thrown away. Having someone else ask you out loud why you want to hang on to the 1980s Walkman does put things in focus and you will have a pain-free time growing the throw away pile if you've got someone to back-up your decisions. If your spouse is the one with the pack rat tendencies, here is a suggestion for helping an unwilling participant say good-bye their treasures. Think small, and begin with the kitchen junk drawers, try to limit handling of old matchbooks and broken screwdrivers to one time only and progressively build to larger things, like collections (for example, choose two or three porcelain bunnies and donate or consign the rest). Catch up us next time as we review managing your move subjects: Pack and Pay, in Part 2 of this blog series.